Life lessons

Should I say ‘should’?

Should. A single striking syllable stressed on, from birth to death.

Should. Should. Should.

They should have ! You should be!

If Should were an object, it would be a fisherman’s net, a rat trap, a hunter’s rifle.

Should reminds me of prison and punishment. Rules and repercussions. I want to run away.

You tell children ” You should do this,” and they question why. You say “Because I say so,” mostly because you don’t know the answer. Maybe you don’t remember why. Maybe you never asked.

As a teenager, you pronounce “This is how I should be” spilling a list of qualities on paper and expecting your mirror to reflect the package. You fall victim to the Should society’s noise, unaware that most of its preachers, who tell you, you should be healthy and happy, rehearse their smiles and never move a muscle.

As a young adult, you discover that life is unkind at times and whine “This should have happened for me.” You pick up the wrapper that is ‘should’ and lick away, lapping up the excuse, and finding no semblance of the chocolaty truth. As you slowly drown in the quicksand of entitlement, you forget that life owes you nothing and you owe yourself everything.

Finally, you determine that the Should sport is not your scene. You throw the tennikoit at others, randomly tossing it away, free of any onus of your own.

You say

“You should fall at the feet of elders” to the kid in the neighbourhood. Why? You don’t know.

“You should spend money that could feed families to throw a grand party and call it marriage.” Why? You don’t know.

At this age, you should ….  At this stage, you should … You babble on relentlessly.

People succumb under the iron weight of your persistence and flatten from a shirt with flair to a pressed, suppressed cloth.

You spend your last days, mourning the loss of time and missing out on accomplishing all that you should have and so begins the self- whiplashing.

Do yourself a favour and go on a should fast for a week.

Replace the shoulds in your life as an experiment.

Strike “I should be doing that.” Say “I want to be doing that.”

Strike “This should happen to me.” Say “This is one of the possibilities.”

Strike “I should be this person.” Say “I aspire to work on becoming this person.”

Would you like to reconsider saying Should?

Hey, it’s up to you. Who am I to say that you should ?!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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19 thoughts on “Should I say ‘should’?

  1. I agree the word should is one I don’t like. As a teacher, I hear students ask why a lot when I ask them to do something, I am not one to use the term because I said so. I never liked it when it happened to me as a kid and I vowed to not use it as an authority figure as an adult. Instead, I’m honest and have a short conversation on the student’s level to help them understand. I find that opening up and being on an equal playing field with them makes them respect me more, even if they still give attitude and are not happy with the decision being made. Kids need boundaries to help them, but they also need to be treated as humans who have questions that seek understanding.

    Liked by 1 person

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